Two sides to a pendulum..
It always has to do it. Swing from one side to another. Once it reaches one side, it probably feels I'm not happy here and I want to be at the other side. Off it goes. The other side reached, it feels no I want to go back. Its never ending. Life's like that! There always has to be a side we want to reach to be happy. Once we reach there, we have some other thing bothering us...
This weekend is my parents-in-law's new house gruha pravesha in Hyderabad. Had we been in India, we'd have already planned our leaves and maybe even would have already been in Hyderabad by this time. Oh the celebration it would have been. The hungama, the confusion about simple things, which saree to wear, the things to help out in, the shifting, it would have been marvellous. As a first big function from Sriram's side, I'd have treated my parents like guests, hurrying here and there and what not! Not that it won't be a great function without us there, its just that I'd have oh-so-much loved to be there..
I obviously feel sad for myself. As a newly married couple, we'd have still been subjected to some teasing. But that's not what I'm gonna miss. All of Sriram's side of relatives are a bunch of fun. I enjoy being with them and thats what I am going to miss. Very badly. I am going to miss each and everything..
I feel sad for Sri. It probably bothers him more that he's not with his parents at this time, but the poor guy has to be brave for my sake. He not only has to deal with missing the function but with me too, as I keep making a fuss that he made me miss my first big function after marriage. Its not true ofcourse. Its just the circumstances. But I have to have somebody at who I can point my finger :(. And bechaara Sri gets it. Honestly, had it been my parents' gruha pravesha, I'd have been uncontrollable . So I do know what Sri must be going through. Poor guy :(.
I feel sad for Amma (Sri's mother). When she told us about the gruha pravesha, I still remember her hopeful voice asking her son whether they'll come back for the function. And I remember the disappointment in her voice when her son replied in a negative way. My mom told me that amma was even telling her that maybe her son and daughter-in-law will land in Hyderabad unannounced and surprise them. I feel extremely sad for the woman who hopes that her son will surprise her when she knows that he won't. Amma, I'm really sorry :(.
I feel sad for daddy (Sri's father), who yesterday, told us that he's deeply disappointed that we are not gonna be there. I've never seen or heard him speak like that. He even said to Sri, "Your Amma cries and controls her emotions, but you know I'm not like that. But I want to let you know that I'm disappointed". But daddy, you know what? We both are lots and lots more disappointed than all of you. Because we are here alone...
I feel sad for my mom and dad who will be on the train to Hyderabad now. It must feel really bad to be attending their daughter's main function, when she's not going to be there. Not that they mind it, they really want to attend. But I wish I was there to boss over them ;-). Sigh!! :((
But among all these, I also know that we have our own gruhapravesha scheduled sometime early next year, when we'll be going back to India. Obviously we have to be there ;-). Then I'll enjoy the same hungaama, same confusions and the company of both sides of relatives. This is the reassurance we both give each other. Thats gonna be some function :). I am smiling already thinking about it :).
We are going to be out of town this weekend, just because I told Sri I won't be able to bear it if I'm at home and am continously thinking about it. Maybe, he wants to getaway too. We are going to Pittsburgh to visit the earliest and the biggest Indian temple in US. Yup, my next post will surely be on that.
Amma and daddy, congratulations on your new home and hope the home will see many happy times, with all of us together. Hope you have a great function and everything goes great and just right :).
5 Comments:
LovingAndLosing retorted...
Aww. That's a sweet post :)
Soumya retorted...
That's so sad Deeps...But yeah, look at the bright side, u'll have a good time when u go for ur grihapravesha...Cheer up, dear girl...Kuch paane keliye, kuch khona padta hai...Don't know what else to say...
I went through the same feeling when I missed all my friends' weddings...Each & every one of my close friends are married now(that includes u) and I wasn't able to attend any of their weddings...Now, it has become a routine to me, I know the handful that're remaining will be married by the time I finish & go back to India...But still, life goes on, alva...
Usha retorted...
That was a very warm and touching post. Gave me an insight into the pangs NRIs must be going through achingly missing home especially during these special moments.
My best wishes go with you that everything will go "just right".
Deeps retorted...
>> Vids >>
Thanks, it was a heartfelt post..
>> Soum >>
Yeah, now I realize what you must have gone through. But you know what? Friends understand if you are not there. They probably give you a few scoldings and then return to normal. But relations are sadly not like that. A simple example, imagine had you not attended your sister's wedding?
>> Usha >>
Thanks :). Before, I never used to think what probably goes through their minds. My cousin missed my wedding, maybe he felt as bad? Now I know the pain..
wise donkey retorted...
thats real sad. :(
and yeah tougher for sri:D
when u talked about ur mil, i could imagine my mil saying someting similar.
best wishes for the function,
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